If you are going to be an editor of poetry know what a haiku is --- if you are going to be the editor of a sports section, understand that the World Series is a big deal - not a page three thing!

Some shopping do's that will make life so much more enjoyable for everyone!

Is there a limit on decorations? Should there be an ordinance - well, hell no, but could there be a citation for tacky??

Please weigh in on what a man should do if he has micro penis, and is there a fate worse than that - if so what is it?

Nothing provides more fodder for this column than large gatherings of people, cocktails and some good friends joining in on the fun………….

Quite frankly I would rather get a dick pic then a foot -- another dating don't from the Bytch.

This is a sad story of dismemberment……

A summary of the writing of the Fifty Shades trilogy or how to make an exciting topic boring.

It's a tough life, but someone has to get manicures, pedicures and tattoos -- and quite frankly more of you should!

Tattoos are not for nut sacks -- literally or figuratively!  But coffee infused tequila is for everyone!

Helping a concerned and confused reader be more confident when discussing their sphincter.

There really is a website called Cougar Life and it never pays to lie.

Grocery shopping is depressing and you should not be subjected to hideous music during that time……….And I lost at a car show

The Champaign County Humane Society holds a big dinner auction called the Fur Ball - this year I am the chair --- I wrote a little poem to the cadence of Twas The Night Before Christmas………..so there!!  I can write an entire poem and blog entry without cussing.

Is saying dick and penis really an academic freedom.  I want to be free to say them, but to preach about that at a top research university………I dare say most of the general public has the brain of a 12-year-old boy!

I clearly missed my calling as a rap artist but am hell on a mower!

Even bitches make fairy gardens sometimes

Sex and aging - different ways around the issues.

Running errands is not a time to comment on the fact that I graduated from Indiana University - it is not a bad thing.

Straightening out who can take a bigger beating - a pussy or a nut sack.  The answer is obvious but you should read more just to make sure you get it!

Being a highly paid sports figure does not mean you should be a role model.

I love to read, but this would certainly make me join a book club!!

Dating may not be for me - and men are unrealistic about themselves -- is this a news flash?

Relationships, funerals, dead koi and bad handshakes.  Another day of free association with the Gym Bytch!

Reports are a grind, WipeOut looks fun, Throat Punch Thursday should be a real thing and anyone that says "Easy Peasy" should be a victim.

Friends are good for lots of things, especially helping you think of great topics!!  They will also talk about the Little League World Series and many other things.

This lady is truly kick ass!

Golf étiquette is never out of style, urinating on the golf course - in the middle of the fairway always is.

The bitch loves cashews, hates dating, hates to see peoples' underwear but would love to own a boat.