Note to self:  Try to never go to the gym at 6pm.

It is too crowded and while there was some good eye candy, there were too many damn people and some  had apparently forgotten to reapply their deodorant. 

I started out on the eliptical - I had my headphones in and was listening to music, but I always look at a tv or two…..and there was a new Cialis commercial on. For those of you that have somehow escaped learning this - Cialis is for erectile dysfunction. This particular commercial seemed to slightly miss the point of what one might want to do with a boner -- the first couple was at a movie in a park - with lots of other people. Pretty sure knocking one off there would result in some jail time. The next couple was in a pool. Have you ever had sex while submerged in water - its not that great - except that you can get away with it in public - well that's what I've heard. The final couple was parasailing. This one was very curious - you might be able to slip someone the high hard one in the first two places - but there is no way in hell you are going to get the deed done while you are strapped into a parasail. That's just a total waste of a hard on. I don't get it. Really. I don't get it, and I don't get it.

Once I was done with the aerobic portion of my workout I went over to lift weights and saw the god damnedest thing I have seen - I stood there and stared - and reached for my phone to film what I was seeing but decided to have a bit of decorum so I just continued to stare. It was an adult male, albeit a small one (under 130lbs which I will get to in a minute). He was on the tricep press down machine - he had both feet off the ground and was swinging his legs as he tried to budge the stack - the stack is 150 - he had it set on 130 - I went over to check - and was literally flaying his legs trying to get the thing pressed now. This where I almost executed a swift punch to the nuts. I figured his ass would hit the seat or he would crumple to the floor. Either was fine with me. Thankfully I have an id, ego and super ego (look it up if you didn't take PSYCH 101) and I did not physically assault him.

This however is where I think a fund comes in. That way bail money could be ready if someday my ability to control myself craps out totally and I do go over and grab some idiot by the throat or the balls.  There was one other man there having a different type of seize than the tricep ass weasel - he was doing the windmill motion with his arms and jumping jack motion with his legs - he looked ridiculous. But good for him he was moving!

Now get out there and get moving……………if you dare!

Love,

The Gym Bytch